The decision to write to transplant recipients is a personal one. As a donor family you may choose when you write to the recipients, if you choose to write to them at all. There is also a misconception that donor families and transplant recipients must wait the infamous “one-year” before writing to each other anonymously through Indiana Donor Network. Please know that there is no timeframe that specifies each party is required to wait one year. Indiana Donor Network supports donor families and recipients writing to each other in their own time, as they are ready to do so.
One donor mother recalls her thoughts as she wrote to her daughter’s recipients for the first time. “I remember wondering if I should write the recipients. Was it too soon? Would they would even really get my letter? Once I convinced myself that I could write to the recipients I wasn’t sure how to start my letter. Should I start with, Dear recipient? Dear family? Hello recipient family? Are there really any “right words” to say? Do I ask how are you? What if they aren’t well? I had so many unanswered questions. I wanted to know everything possible and was also afraid of the answers.”
This may or may not happen for most, but what I can say looking back is that I should have just written what my heart felt …..as the saying goes” follow your heart.”
Donor families often express the sentiment that the most important aspect of the donation is that the recipients are doing well and that they are given the gift of renewed health. It is because of this that many donor families contact Aftercare Support to check on the current health status of the recipients prior to writing the letter.
There is not a one-size fits all method for writing to recipients. For more helpful tips on writing to your loved one’s recipients, click HERE.
If you are interested in writing to a recipient, please contact the Aftercare Support team at 888.275.4676 or email aftercare@INDonorNetwork.org.
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